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Current Satire Stories

  • Dogs, Drugs, and Forgiveness

     
  • Tragedy Strikes Sullivan's Pond

     
  • How to Make Love in a Canoe

     
  • North Korea Axes Public Executions

     
  • Senior Duffers Rules of Golf

     
  • It (Usually) Never Rains In California

     
  • Snubs and Flubs at the Oscar Nominations

     
  • My Aching Back and the Magical Little Christmas Tree

     
  • Road-Tested and Ready

     
  • Trump: Worse Than a Poke in the Knee with a Sharp Scalpel?

     
  • Is There a Doctor in the House?

     
  • Skittles - A Modest Proposal

     
  • Cork and the Geez Critique Movies, Parking and Procrastination

     
  • If Trump Wins Due to Matt Lauer Interview, It's MY Fault

     
  • Why My Plants Hold Their Ears

     
  • Living Dead is the Best Revenge

     
  • Jan's Weight Loss Secrets!

     
  • SHUT UP! Can't You See I'm Meditating?

     
  • The Fire This Time

     
  • 13 Favorite Snarky Reviews of Fairly Famous Flicks

     
  • Cork and the Geez May Movie Madness

     
  • 15 Truths About the Joys of Granddaughters

     
  • Two Award Worthy Performances You Almost Never Saw

     
  • Valentine's Day Checklist

     
  • Before You Hunker Down, SHOP!

     
  • El Nino Hammers Hollywood (Film at 11!)

     
  • Did I Just Call Dick Van Dyke "Horrible"?

     
  • Star Wars Would Be Different If ItsTechnology Was Like Ours

     
  • Pioneer Who Took Flying from Pleasant to Unbearable Dies

     
  • Future News: Syria Rejects American Refugees

     
  • The Dog Who Tried to Kill Me

     
  • Top 15 Other Presidential Hopefuls

     
  • School Div to Build Special Wings To Host Every Possible Gender

     
  • Saving the Sage Grouse

     
  • Cork's Top 15 Rules for the Next GOP Debate

     
  • The Cork Report: Cork Test Drives ComedyWire

     
  • Humans Mourn Loss of Monster Who Would Love to Eat Their Children

     
  • Top 15 Rejected Nicknames for New Planes

     
  • Romance in Jeopardy

     
  • White House Reports 120,000 New Dead-End Jobs This Month

     
  • Indiana Senior Citizens Euchre Games Busted

     
  • Oscar Winner J.K. Simmons Makes New Demands Of Farmers Insurance Ad Agency

     
  • UFO's: Ex-CIA Unit Debunks Existence

     
  • Bad Girl: Stomping on the Box

     
  • True Truth: Six Conspiratorial Conspiracies Debunkified

     
  • Blatter Quits FIFA to Boost NFL Goodell's Integrity

     
  • Nickname Guide for Newborn Princesses

     
  • Hubbies, Hillary and Police Brutality; News Bits You Missed

     
  • Texas Zoos to Cure Animals of Gay Behavior + More News Bits

     
  • Exclusive! Leaked Docs Show ETs Contacted All US Pres Since 1962

     
  • Ed Toolis' News Bits # 6

     
  • Bring Back Trash!

     
  • Ed Toolis' News Bits

     
  • The Sage Reviews the Hottest Online Games

     
  • Frito-Lay Chips Away Pot Stigma

     
  • Sea Shanties: The Bane of My Medical Modeling Career

     
  • 15 Things I Found While Looking for My Car Keys

     
  • FINAL Oscar Analysis (Thanks Cousin Morty)

     
  • Unique Person Found in Hollywood

     
  • SNN Mourns the Loss of America's Most Trusted Anchorman

     
  • Oklahoma Bans Much of History from Public School Textbooks

     
  • Top 16 Slogans Kim Jong-un Wrote. Or Didn't

     
  • 50 Shades of Grey-Haired Dates

     
  • White House Unveils New ISIS Crisis Media Campaign

     
  • Fox Shock: Is News Channel History?

     
  • Anti-Vaxxers Cause Riots at Gov. Chris Christie Rally

     
  • Romney Loses the Presidential Election for 3rd Time

     
  • Republicans Vow to Stop ObamaCollege from Becoming Law

     
  • Brian Williams Scandal Smears The Sage News Network

     
  • ISIS Social Media Strategy Backfires

     
  • Homegrown Evidence Weighs Heavy For Brian Williams

     
  • Why Are More & More Wild Animals Flooding the Suburbs?

     
  • Republicans' 2016 Campaign for the White House Coming to a Close Soon

     
  • "Secular" Corporations Pull a "Hobby Lobby"

     
  • George Zimmerman Arrested for Third Time

     
  • North Korea Issues Press Release for Their Comedy Movie, "US imperialists Will Face Final Doom"

     
  • Shocking! Source Says: Dems to Bow Out in 2016

     
  • Eau de Garbage at Wind in the Laurels

     
  • The Profit Motive and the Media

     
  • Here Are the Latest Headlines The Sage's are Working On.

     
  • Bibles Used for Xbox Scam

     
  • Ancient Astronauts New Discovery

     
  • Miley Cyrus, a Dead Dog and a Moil Walk into a Bar

     
  • Grampy vs Four-Year-Old and a Spider

     
  • NASA Claims Life On Mars a 'Near Possible Certainty'

     
  • PETA hacks into "The Cooking Channel" Servers

     
  • Alberta Government secret project thwarted by Wildrose crossings

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • All I Want for Christmas is No More Stuff

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Sweden Scours Waters For Valhalla

     
  • All I Want for Christmas; an Apology

     
  • PM Stephen Harper Becomes Latest Casualty in SNN - Kim Jong-Un Controversy

     
  • Writer of Controversial Kim Jong-Un Article Does Q&A via Social Media

     
  • North Korean News Network Attacks SNN for Kim Jong-Un Article

     
  • 15 Absolute Truths About Thanksgiving Dinner

     
  • Russian Lawmakers Propose New Anti-Gay Legislation

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Politician Wants to Ban Your Sex Fantasies

     
  • Kim Kardashian's Booty has been nominated

     
  • 15 Things I Know to be True about US Presidents

     
  • Here are the latest stores we are working on.

     
  • Dating After 50 Not Going Well

     
  • Leaked documents suggest ISIS was created by the CIA

     
  • Crap Situation Mushrooms

     
  • I Forget What This Story Is About, and So Do I

     
  • Here are the latest stores we are working on.

     
  • Sleeping Better with Norad

     
  • You Can't Get Ebola from a Gopher

     
  • Here are the latest stores we are working on.

     
  • Canadians Advised to Act Accordingly

     
  • CorkList: Ten Favorite Zamfir Tunes

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • St. Luke's Hospital Sends Second Ransom Note

     
  • Joe Clancy may be taking new security measures too far

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • 15 Reasons Why ETs Have Not Landed Yet

     
  • Our Technological Toys

     
  • BREAKING NEWS ITEMS: What we are working on.

     
  • Pizza Spokesrat Shot; Police Suspect All Parents

     
  • Iceland to Use New Volcano Naming System

     
  • BREAKING NEWS ITEMS: What we are working on.

     
  • Packing Heat for the BBQ

     
  • To Sleep; Perchance to, um...

     
  • BREAKING NEWS ITEMS: What we are working on.

     
  • Clothing Optional

     
  • FAA Approves New Airline; 'Brawl Airways'

     
  • Mysterious disease sweeps through Russian military

     
  • Must Watch Made-for-Mobile-Devices Movies

     
  • BREAKING NEWS ITEMS: What we are working on.

     
  • US Government hires Seth Rogen

     
  • Torture: Good for What Ails You?

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Russia Imposes Sanctions On Its Own People

     
  • You to Can Right Gud Like Me Do

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Cork's List: The Poop on the Pills I Pop

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Queen's Hat Fails Colour Test

     
  • A Secret Shocking Secret Sacred Secret Oath Exposed

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • What Amusement Parks Would You Like to Visit?

     
  • Yes, No, or None of the Above?

     
  • The Cork Report: Kenny G Cuts With Titles I Forgot

     
  • Dental As Anything; Cork's Post-Op Tips

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Cork's Top 12 List: World Cup Soccer

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • No Pope-a-Dope, Francis Takes Cautions

     
  • GMO Food Labels, Warnings Needless, Claim Farmers, Food Industry, Evil Mutants.

     
  • A Duffer's Guide to Great Golf (Just Kidding)

     
  • Hillary Issues 420 Pot Concerns

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • UN Security Council gathers for emergency meeting on North Korea

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • A World Cup Soccer Survivalist's Guide

     
  • Courts To Settle Judicial Disputes WWE Raw Style

     
  • Fat Old Guy Halfway Home in Frontal Attack on Beer Gut

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Sith Face Discrimination in Ukraine

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On.

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News

     
  • INTRODUCING: The Black Hole (TM) Vacuum Cleaner

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On.

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - Is Politics Making the Country Dumber?

     
  • A Pair of Corkers

     
  • Grim Reaper Faces Legal Challenge

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - "Vampire Therapy"

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Televangelist Launches Prophecy Hotline

     
  • The Numbers Game

     
  • Punctuating the Silence

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - Minority Rights

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • NY Cops Bust 'Most Positive Band Ever'

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - Guns Everywhere Law

     
  • A Fracking Joke

     
  • Did Miley Cyrus Tweak Her Twerker?

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - Domestic Spying

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On

     
  • Otterman Returns

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • London Life Dumps "Freedom 55"; Launches "Servitude 75"

     
  • Woman Gets Hair Transplant For Her Legs

     
  • GRANNY'S STILL GOT IT (and grandpa too) (c) 2013

     
  • 2 Plus 2 Equals Miley

     
  • Turkish PM Outlaws All Communication

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On

     
  • Technology in the News

     
  • Yes, Virginia, There IS an Easter Bunny

     
  • Ocean garbage: Union says they can't deal with it

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - on Guns

     
  • Here are the latest stories The Sage is working on.

     
  • New NSA Surveillance Program Forces Three-Way Calling

     
  • Another Snippet from Fox News - Minimum Wage

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is Working On

     
  • ETs Land, Hold Presser, Go Home

     
  • SAT Test Won't Beat Around the Bush

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Republicans Blast Democrats for Wanting to Give Ex-Felons the Right to Vote

     
  • Cowell and Ramsay Sign On to Become Muppet Hecklers

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Notable Quotes from Tea Party 5th Anniversary Convention

     
  • Quebec's Rights Charter Brings Down Ukrainian Government

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Oscar, Schmoscar!

     
  • Fallon Kicks Sand in Letterman's Pie Hole, Will The Big Man Retaliate?

     
  • Here are some of the Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Cops Raid David Suzuki's House

     
  • Russians Invent Brave New Winter Sports to Keep World Interested

     
  • Can Helmets Help Bird Brains or Do Their Peckers Doom Them?

     
  • Zamboni Driver Takes Gold in Olympic Figure Skating

     
  • Facebook Turns 10. Edits Profile to Look Older.

     
  • Latest Headlines from the Sage Newsroom.

     
  • Top 10 Reasons Why We May Already Be Dead

     
  • Keystone XL Pipeline Will Now Bring Seawater to Alberta

     
  • New WHO Report: Friedchickenitis on the Rise

     
  • Here are some of the Headlines The Sage is working on.

     
  • Cupid's Valentine Shocker: He's Loveless and in Rehab

     
  • Smart Phones, Operating Systems and Breakdowns

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage News is working on.

     
  • Stoners to Pack the Super Bowl

     
  • Methane in Arctic Circle Caused by Polar Bear Flatulence

     
  • Open Letter to Al Franken

     
  • "Mitt" Documentary Reveals Romney's Inner Robot

     
  • Stoners Hijack Plane to Colorado

     
  • Terrorism Update: Bargains! Sochi News! Airline Food!

     
  • Here are the Latest Headlines The Sage News is working on.

     
  • The World's Best Franchise Opportunities

     
  • Airline Says "Oops, My Bad" After Man Flying to New York Wakes up in Thailand

     
  • New Marijuana Apps Make Way for MaryJane

     
  • Killing Time with Erector Head and Deliverance

     
  • Sweden: Birthplace of the Blues

     
  • Canada Goose Bullies American Eagle: Poops in Sears CEO's Yard

     
  • Paying It Forward: One Man's Domestic Genius

     
  • Worst Shows of the New TV Season

     
  • My Recent Holiday Humbug

     
  • New 2014 Laws Affect Salami, Moose, Sister-wives, Crack

     
  • Most Fraudulent Book Titles of 2013

     
  • On the Twelfth Night of Christmas I Got Camel Poop

     
  • Is That a 'Scope in Your Pocket, Or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

     
  • Re-Gifting to Myself

     
  • Save the Children

     
  • Surprising Facts About "Afternoon Delight"

     
  • Prairie Chickens Cause Surveillance Concerns in Ft. Mac

     
  • Culture Wars: Saturnalia

     
  • Amazon Drones Get Public Makeover

     
  • The Worst Car in the History of Earth*

     
  • Xmas Newsletter 2013: We Put the Fun in Dysfunctional

     
  • Politicians Causing Unemployment Among Comedians

     
  • Mike Duffy and Rob Ford Found New Political Party

     
  • An Interview with Stephen King

     
  • Trifling with Truffles

     
  • Prediction; 2014 Will Be the Dumbest Year Ever

     
  • Cetacious Flatulence Linked to Climate Change

     
  • Before Santa Arriveth, The Rug Guy Cometh

     
  • Giant Sea Turtle on Collision Course with Hawaii

     
  • U.S. Black Friday Riots Now Legal

     
  • Take This Bird and Stuff It!

     
  • Distracted Half-ton Meteorite that Crashed into Earth was Texting, Tweeting

     
  • Thanksgiving Reminds Americans How Much they Hate Turkey

     
  • Entire World Will be Dead by Christmas

     
  • Scratchcard Winner's Hopes For Italy

     
  • UK Abolishes English Language to save Jobs

     
  • Miss Piggy - Bitter and Alone

     
  • Secrets of Manly Males, Nails & Max Factor

     
  • Media Outlets Sick of Rob Ford: Decide to Focus on Something Else

     
  • Mathematician Discovers World's Longest Integer

     
  • Berlusconi Sues Italy for Harassment

     
  • 12 Shocking Things to Watch For When Seeing 'Gravity' Again

     
  • New Zealand's Shepherd Jacking Crisis: A Special Report

     
  • Self-Service Police Program Unveiled at Conference

     
  • Chicago Changes Name to Boston

     
  • Truth About Red Planet is Revealed

     
  • Latest iPhone has Coffee, Wardrobe Features, But No Phone

     
  • BIGGER the Figure, the More There is... Trans Fat??

     
  • Ringo Marries Yoko

     
  • Final Goodbye to Tiny Nun

     
  • Angela Merkel: Snowden to Testify in Germany

     
  • Cirque du Soleil Denounces Abstract Performances

     
  • Disney Buys the Holy Land

     
  • Kick your Assets

     
  • Downsize Your Children

     
  • U.S. Immigration Refuses Entry to Migrating Geese

     
  • NSA Accused of Spying on Itself

     
  • Unexpected Discovery at Welsh Hospital

     
  • Buggy Obamacare Website Cost More than Iraq War

     
  • New App Translates Keith Richards into English

     
  • Eureka Technology Fair - Making the Possible Possible

     
  • Ultimate Proud Mary Triumph!

     
  • Expert Says Future is Late

     
  • A new organized anti karaoke - The Thrawgs

     
  • The Restaurant that serves . . .Poo

     
  • New Laws For Werewolf Owners

     
  • Global News Team Abducted by Aliens

     
  • Miraculous Downtown Detroit Crash Landing

     
  • Fired Air Force General Can't Keep His Nuclear Arsenal

     
  • Date Night For Me and My Mechanical Man

     
  • Airbus Changes Name to Airplane

     
  • Local Garage Band Perfects "Proud Mary"

     
  • Chrysler Introduces Self-Texting Car

     
  • Michele Bachmann: "Doctor Who is Real."

     
  • TED Talks Cancelled for Lack of New Ideas

     
  • So What Do Citizens Have to Say about the US Government Shutdown?

     
  • France Refuses to Honor Warrantee on Louisiana Purchase

     
  • Harper Set to Change How Public Servants Say Hello

     
  • Higgs Wins Nobel Prize for Finding Particle He Lost

     
  • Twitter Success in 10 Easy Tweets

     
  • My Facebook Divorce

     
  • Muslim Cleric Shifts Female Attire Position

     
  • Top 10 Reasons to Avoid Top 10 Lists

     
  • Top 10 Benefits of the US Government Shutdown

     
  • Showtime's Series, Masters of Sex:

     
  • VIDEO: Ed Toolis - An Introduction and Taste of what is to come.

     
  • Dear Mr. Rizzuto ...

     
  • The NHL has announced it will merge with the IIHF for the 2014/15 season.

     
  • Republicans Were Right: Obamacare Unleashes Armageddon

     
  • US Senators Remove Toilet Paper from House of Representatives

     
  • The CFL expands into the Northwest Territories

     
  • Latest from the CFL: Edmonton Eskimos are Out

     
  • Ricky Ray Banned from the CFL

     
  • Spelling Bee Champ Denies Using Performance-Enhancing Drugs

     
  • Diet Champ Probed Over Missing Limbs

     
  • Papers Reveal Churchill's Clowns

     
  • L.A. Cops to look into Deadly Paint

     
  • Shock Recall of Voyager Probe

     
  • Berlusconi Gives New Hope to Hair Loss Victims

     
  • Medicine Hat Inundated With Sick Headgear

     
  • Exploding Hockey Pucks Intercepted at Canadian Border

     
  • Obedience Canada profiles Men

     
  • Humor Break! Diet, Exercise and Other Fables

     
  • My Canadian Carpenter Ants Who Haven't Repaired a Damn Thing.

     
  • PGA: Go whack your balls elsewhere.

     
  • AN OPEN LETTER: To Woody Allen

     
  • U.S. and Russia Heading Toward World War Gay

     
  • Cougar Spotted in Downtown Toronto: Terrifies College Graduate.

     
  • NSA goes down on Italian Couple.

     
  • Television: Sucks your Mind Dry.

     
  • Jan Marshall Wants My Love-Child or Maybe Just Eggs

     
  • Bank Moving to Face Recognition Technology

     
  • Global Warming: We are all going to die!

     
  • Texting Behind Increase in Irritable Vowel Syndrome

     
  • McDonald's Commits to Reducing Food-Flinging Injuries

     
  • SNN Intercepts Telephone Communication Between Obama and Morsi

     
  • New Toy Idea - My First Autopsy

     
  • TSA Focuses on Efficiency: 'Repack Your Own Checked Baggage'

     
  • The Cow Diet Craze That is Sweeping the Nation

     
  • Couples-only-Vibrator hits market with a Buzz.

     
  • Prime Minister Lauded by Fashion Critics for his Hip Style

     
  • Reflections on the Marriage Contract

     
  • Mind Over Matter and a Clean Bedroom

     
  • Dear Benji, Love Mom

     
  • Halifax Mayor Booted Out of Office "Cause He's a Good Guy"

     
  • Dear Publisher's Clearing House

     
  • Gonzo Mondegreens

     
  • Ontario Premier Improving Balance Through Cyber Feng Shui

     
  • Dear Exercise Nuts

     
  • Man Sues Cosmetics Company After Contracting Freckles

     
  • Company Falls Apart After Employee Takes Day Off

     
  • Bachmann Gets 'Stamp of Approval' from Klobuchar and Franken

     
  • My Life is Falling Apart: Film at 11

     
  • Missing from The Marriage Debate: How to Tell When It's Kaput

     
  • Homeless Shelter Reaches Out to Mike Duffy

     
  • The Next Fake Scandal

     
  • The Final Season

     
  • Martha Stewart: Dating and Her Up Till Now Secret Twin Dartha

     
  • CPAC Tops Weekly Cable Network Ratings

     
  • National No Make-Up Day Causes Chaos

     
  • Hell's Angels Support Obama's Campaign on Gun Control

     
  • Lion Air: Myopic Pilots Need Not Apply

     
  • CBSA Deploying New Smell-O-Vision X-ray Technology

     
  • Who's that on the phone? Facebook will Tell You

     
  • Federal Government Launches Taxpayer Loyalty Program

     
  • New Cryptid Discovered at Kalmalka Lake, British Columbia

     
  • First Look: Extreme Sock Folding Premieres on TLC

     
  • Prime Minister Concludes Successful Visit to Men's Room

     
  • National Retail Giant Receives Excellence in Mediocrity Award

     
  • Coming Soon: I am Number 2,987

     
  • The sodden politics of the BC Liberals

     
  • Candidate for the Darwin Award

     
  • Are you doing your job correctly?

     
  • The Tale of the Salmon Mousse

     
  • The "Cracked' Actor

     
  • Shades of Grey

     
  • The Free Bird

     
  • Angry in Argentina

     
  • What's in a Sage?

     
  • Racially Miffed, or just Anti-Canadian?

     
  • Noble creature, the Canadian Beiber.

     
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