Mike Duffy and Rob Ford Found New Political Party
Bozos of the World; UNITE!
(SNN) - In a surprise move today, Mike Duffy and Rob Ford announced that they are forming a new political party to run federally.
Mr. Duffy, the party's interim leader and spokesman, stated: “It is the intention of Mr. Ford and me to form a new party so that the true voice of Canadian politics can be heard. Our party is built on the twin pillars of accountability and fiscal restraint. It is unfortunate that the police and auditors are affecting our work, and making it impossible for us to fulfill the wishes of our electorate.”
Reporters then asked each man when the leadership convention would be held and how many candidates Mr. Duffy and Mr. Ford hoped would run in the next federal election. Mr. Ford, after appearing to tickle Mr. Duffy's ear, stated that the leadership convention would be held in Mr. Duffy's home riding of Ottawa within the next few months. Mr. Duffy seemed to blink rapidly after this remark, but then composed himself. Mr. Ford went on to say that all of the candidates running for the party would be ordinary, blue collar working people like him. Each candidate would have to be proficient using a cell phone, and should meet with their constituents in parks and back alleys.
When asked by reporters if the party had a name, Mr. Duffy and Mr. Ford stated that the party would be called the BOZ Organization Party. When asked what “BOZ” meant, Mr. Duffy stated that “B” stands for “Big” people. Both men then ran their hands all the way down their ties.
Mr. Duffy then went on to say that “O” stands for “Ordinary” people, and that “Z” stands for “Zombies”. Mr. Ford jumped in to explain that the zombie part of the name will appeal to young voters.
“We know that young voters will want to vote for our candidates posing as zombies”, stated Mr. Ford.
When a reporter pointed out that the party name could be shortened to the Bozo Party, both Mr. Duffy and Mr. Ford shrugged and left the stage with their bodyguards.
Photo by: West Annex News flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed
More Satire News
-
Dogs, Drugs, and Forgiveness
Wednesday, October 25, 2017
(SNN) Oh my goodness. Just heard that the four time champion of Alaska's Iditarod may have given his dogs drugs to enhance their speed. Now, I wonder if my former Golden Labrador dog Charlie (Charles Worthington ...
-
Tragedy Strikes Sullivan's Pond
Monday, August 14, 2017
(SNN) After being sent yesterday by The Sage News Network to cover a memorial held for two geese that had been tragically run over, I sit at home today enjoying delicious foie gras on crackers. The event was held ...
-
How to Make Love in a Canoe
Monday, July 03, 2017
One night a young amorous Sioux Had a date with a maiden he knioux; The coroner found The couple had drowned Making love in a leaky canoe -Anonymous (SNN) The French gave the world a kiss, the Spanish provided an ...
-
North Korea Axes Public Executions
Tuesday, June 20, 2017
(SNN) Pyongyang, North Korea –In response to a major shift in US Foreign Policy and rumors of a possible state visit by US President Donald Trump, North Korean authorities have been ordered to curtail public trials ...
-
Senior Duffers Rules of Golf
Sunday, June 18, 2017
(SNN) It’s Spring and the thoughts of masochists turn to golf. When people ask me if I play golf, I respond: "I play a game similar to golf, only with more lurching about and travel." Actually there's nothing similar ...
-
It (Usually) Never Rains In California
Thursday, February 09, 2017
(SNN) When I was notified I had won a prize for rainmaking I was gob-smacked while trying to close my umbrella. The last one to win that prestigious award was Burt Lancaster whom I’m often mistaken for without my ...
-
Snubs and Flubs at the Oscar Nominations
Wednesday, January 25, 2017
11. Worse singing by a nominated Actress: Meryl Streep, in “Florence Foster Jenkins.” (This is her second nomination in this category. She won previously for “Mama Mia”) 10. Most academy award nominations for ...
-
My Aching Back and the Magical Little Christmas Tree
Wednesday, December 21, 2016
(SNN) We moved from Washington DC to Los Angeles CA in the Summer of 1983, lock, stock, dog and our two kids—John, almost eight, and Andrew almost four. They adjusted to their new environs as best they could. Come ...
-
Road-Tested and Ready
Thursday, December 08, 2016
(SNN) I don’t list Automotive Writer on my resume, but my need for new transportation has led me to a new car search. I went to a couple of recent auto shows, road-tested several models—some cars too—and did my ...
-
Trump: Worse Than a Poke in the Knee with a Sharp Scalpel?
Saturday, November 19, 2016
(SNN) I am a glutton for punishment. That’s why I scheduled a visit with an Osteopathic Surgeon the day after the Presidential election. I figured if worst came to worst at the polls, the prospeceet of major surgery ...