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Sweden Scours Waters For Valhalla

Photo: Swedish Chef Class Destroyer

(SNN) - The latest reports indicate Sweden is continuing to scour the waters off Stockholm for a Russian submarine. They insist it’s there somewhere and they’re going to find it.

But local storyteller and expert in Viking lore, Harald BlodAx, has a different take on the story. Harald doesn’t think Swedish military heard a Russian sub communicating with its base. Harald says they’ve discovered Valhalla and the Russian submarine story is only a cover to keep the amazing discovery under wraps. When queried for more information, Harald explained Valhalla is covered in gold and the government wants all of the gold for itself. Harald says “I’ve researched the ancient Viking scripts and rune stones in the area and all point to Valhalla near Stockholm in the Baltic Sea. And how ridiculous is it to find a Russian sub in our waters, this is not the Cold War.”

A government official, Balder Dashan, refuted Harald’s claim. “Valhalla is a myth and never existed. We have every reason to believe a Russian sub rested in Swedish waters for at least a few days.” He goes on to add, “Harald also claims he’s a direct descendant of Eric Bloodaxe. Who are you going to believe?”

Unaltered Photo: Some Rights Reserved by Kristian Wiklund  flickr photostream, The Sage nor this article endorsed. The original image can be found here

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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