Old Coot Cork's New Year Note to his Peeps
Photo: Cork Interviewing Steve Martin and Dan Ackroyd
Happy New Year all.
Specifically to my great family and friends.
Also, while I'm at it, my frequent lunch companion, Steven Spielberg, and the wonderful tales he's told me. Happy and healthy new year to Babs and the Cloonman, to Biebmeister and my always classy dear personal friend, Madonna. (Time to retire the conical bra, Sweety.)
Harrison--not to rub it in, but I told you that fuel mix was a tricky little devil on those old planes. To Woody, who finally admits there was more blowback to his marriage to his daughter--as I'd warned--than he expected.
To my agent, Ziggy Faloof, who continues to remind me the stuff I send him "is too damn good" to submit anywhere. To Jerry, who is such a pest asking me to do that Comedians in Cars thing he's running. To Dave: I hope you're enjoying your retirement and this year we'll definitely join you, Biff and Paul, at the ranch.
Hil...promise me this year you'll at least consider miniskirts. Bernie, promise me you won't.
To "Guaco the Wondercock," my favorite performing rooster--sorry we couldn't book you before Stupid Pet Tricks went away.
To Hef--always happy to give you dating tips. And to "you know who"--Hey, buddy, the "Great Again" ball cap was a good stalling device, but seriously it's time to drop out and turn the nomination over to Jebebediah Bush.
Your Close Personal Friend,
Cork
John "Cork" Corcoran
The Nineteenth Funniest Non-working Humorist in America,
So voted by the 6000 membership Comedywire.Com Website
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