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Crap Situation Mushrooms

(SNN) - Foodophiles are disturbed as a situation develops in BC’s Okanagan Valley that may turn out to be more widespread. White, crimini, portabella, and the more exotic mushrooms are disappearing from produce cases.

Information on the disappearance of mushrooms initially came from a produce stocker (some say a produce “stalker”) who has been dubbed the “food innuendo guy,” from the song by Adam Sandler.

The shortage is said to be due to a “compost issue” and is expected to last “several months”. Details are not available, but bullshit is likely involved. As happened following a shortage of coffee and sugar, mushroom prices will rise sharply when supply resumes, and stay high. It is evident the mushroom shortage is a true crap situation.

As food for thought, B.C. is known for its wild-growing “magic” mushrooms – it’s possible that using magic mushrooms can lessen the impact of this problem, not to mention other problems.

Image: Some Rights Reserved by Rex Pechler, The Sage nor this article endorsed, The original image can be found here.


DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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